Saturday, 30 January 2021

THE RED SHAME

Last year, in a college in Bhuj, a college principal forced the girls to remove their undergarments to prove that they were not menstruating.This happened after the hostel warden complained that the menstruating girls had entered kitchen and went near temple. Unfortunately, Such bizarre incidents of 'period shaming' are not very rare to hear, though most being unreported. 

Menstruation is a natural part of the reproductive cycle in which blood from the uterus exits through the vagina. Ironically, the same vagina which gives birth to human race is considered 'impure' when it bleeds each month  and so is the body of the girl. 
Shaming stems from secrecy and discretion which starts from the home itself. Mothers hide the sanitary pads in the cupboards.The moment a sanitary napkin ad plays on the TV, either the channel is changed or the kids are distracted. This stigma gets reflected in the commercial ads of sanitary pads which show a blue stain on the pads instead of blood. Just like the word 'sex' raises eyebrow in the society, so do the words 'menstruation' or 'period' . So, the admakers euphemize it with 'mushkil dino me' or 'un dino me'. Shopkeepers give the sanitary pads wrapped in newspapers or in black plastic bags.The shame and secrecy associated with menstruation have wide consequences. It forces girls to opt out of school once they reach puberty, impeding the growth of female literacy in India.
It results in improper disposal methods of sanitary pads thus harming the environment. Because the stigma is so pervasive , discussion on other related issues like disposal of menstrual wastes, menstrual hygiene,  affordability of menstrual products etc are always put on the backburner.

Seclusion and Restrictions 
 Every girl is more or less ostracised and discriminated for an inevitable and normal biological process that she goes through each month.  This untouchability cuts across societies, religion or regions. 

Menstruation already entails on a girl a variety of physical pain and weakness, hormonal imbalances and mood swings . If that wasn't enough, they have to deal with the family and society ready with a list of do's and don'ts to be followed by the menstruating girl. The diktats enforced range from  restrictions in daily life activities like not entering kitchen or prayer room, not touching the sources of water to being shamed and treated as untouchable or a jinx. The practice of making the menstruating girl sleep on the floor or a separate bed is common.In some parts of India and Nepal, there exists a practice of exiling women from their homes to huts or sheds during menstruation.  Unfortunately , all these often happens with the connivance of the mother or an elderly woman of the house who had already faced such discrimination but blindfolded by socio-religious norms, readily imposes the same on her daughter. Menstruating girls thus have to bear pain, shame and seclusion, all at once. They form a unique class of 'untouchables'

Religion : the oppressive catalyst 

Religions around the world have deeply entrenched patriarchy and misogyny. The rudimentary brains of early humans thought that women were being divinely punished by bleeding for a few days. This belief gradually got ingrained into the later religions made by men. Not surprising that, most religions (except Sikhism) strongly reinforce the notion of women becoming impure during menstrual cycle. 
♦️Islam 'excuses 'women to pray or fast or even touch Quran during menses.What if a girl feels absolutely fine during any point of her period and wants to pray or fast ? What if she wants to perform prayer or recite Quran as she hopes it may help her mood swings or peevishness? No, she cannot pray because her license to pray gets suspended temporarily each month when she is inevitably 'unclean'.
♦️ In Ramdhan, prohibition on fasting leads to awkward embarrassment and period shaming for Muslim girls who often eat secretly to not let the male members of their families know that they are menstruating. 
♦️ Prayer is a spiritual activity which just requires a  calm and focused state of mind with an intention to connect to the Almighty. Why should be Almighty bothered about it's own created bodily secretions and make it a reason for temporary suspension of one's desire to connect to Him? 
♦️  Hindu women aren't allowed to enter temples or puja room and kitchen. 
A person with a state of mind polluted with anger, lust, ego, avarice can enter temples and mosques, touch' holy books 'but a girl with a bleeding vagina cannot. Strange! 
If prayer is a complete spiritual process, why should a physiological process  become a reason to forbid it? For a girl ,menstruating days could be a time when she needs the divine connection more than ever. 

Breaking the mental shackles of should start from the women folk themselves.  
♦️ Call a spade a spade. During menstrual cramps, don't be quiet but express honestly that you are in pain because of periods , like you say openly when you have a stomach ache or headache. 
♦️ Don't whisper to the friend or shopkeeper asking for a pad. Ask in a normal voice like you ask for a Band-Aid when you get hurt 
♦️ Don't use discreet words or euphemism to make it palatable to the society. The usual code of ‘I am not feeling well’ needs to end. Be specific and transparent. . 
♦️ Question the restrictions imposed on your mobility when you bleed. Have open conversations with family and friends even when they tacitly try resist it.

The elephant in the room must be addressed.Far from being treated equality, women are still struggling for being treated with dignity.  A human is born out of a bleeding vagina. In the womb, The human baby derives its nourishment from the mother's blood through the placenta. If the vaginal fluid and blood makes a girl impure , by that logic, the birth of human race itself becomes impure. Menstruation is an indispensable and inevitable biological process, a mark of fertility without which human race shall cease to exist. Nothing more, nothing less. Instead of shaming women for this natural cycle, we should acknowledge that our very existence is dependent on it